"Dear Diary…"

Everyone has kept a “diary” (especially you women) at some point in their life, in which they have blurted out their “deepest and darkest secrets” and emotions and feelings and all the other rot. Our “diary” is generally a substitute friend in which we vent our hearts out, which we would actually have preferred doing with a living breathing reacting soul instead, at least I would have OR it is this source of amusement ten years down the line when you are laughing your buttuties off at the fact that you were once such a kid. Anyhoo, yesterday, while “studying”, I came across my “diary”. It had only one entry in it, written all the way back in the millennium year. On the cover I had made a movie-like effort to write “STOP”, “DON’T TOUCH”, “DANGER” and all the other rubbish with white-ink. It was an old book, so I stapled the first few pages to make it look new, and wolah! – I had a new “diary”. This is how my first and only entry exactly went:

Today it is the 25^th of Jan, 2000, the tuesday :-

My life is ruined. I, being only in 5^th have to study so much! How can I study for 6 hours. There is a limit for everything. My sister is in 2^nd year of college and she dose’nt study for 6 hours per day. I cannot go for the football tournament on thursday if I do not study well on wednesday. I cannot do down(stairs) to play football except for wednesday and thursday because this is my final term. I have friends who are in 6^th, 7^th, 8^th. They are not studying as much as I am. Now when I tell this to my parents they say, “Do not compare.” And when my friend gets little higher marks than me, then my parents say, “Next time you should get higher marks than him.” Is’nt that comparing!

My computer had gone down for repair for 3 weeks. So I couldn’t play computer for 3 weekends, that is 12 hours (I got to play 4 hours per weekend on those days). And then when the computer comes, I get my time of 4 hours, not even 6!

Nothing is going my way, not at home or at school. I am not getting good grades in my projects cause I am not getting information. I don’t have information at home. So I have to get information from the net. But the computer was’nt there for 3 weeks. So no net. Now that I have got net, I haven’t got ‘Microsoft Word!’!!!

In my cricket match, I feilded well but bowled not so good. But it was my first over of the tournament.

———- 0 ———-

Which match? – Don’t know, don’t remember, so don’t ask. By the way, that was a completely unedited version of the entry, no grammar check, no punctuation correction and no additional masala added to make you go ‘=O’. Surprisingly the entry didn’t have any girl related issues, which normally make it in most of these diaries, especially those pink ones.

I remember Tejas started a diary in 10^th grade – yeah he was real grown up then. And well it was really unique, he wrote, for a week I think, every single detail of that Ali did. ‘Ali looked at me’, ‘Ali laughed’, ‘Ali dug his nose’, ‘Romit!’, ‘Harry is crazzzzy’, ‘Ali is guitar’, ‘Ali and I went up to Mrs Joshi and screwed Romit over, and Mrs Joshi loves Anish’. Now if you ever get hold of that, either you’ll get annoyed reading it or laugh your asses off. We do the latter.

P.S. If anyone doubts the ‘veracity’ of the diary entry, please feel free to ask me to show it to you if you ever make it to my place. =)