Ok, this has got nothing to do with MSN Messenger and my status on the list of my MSN buddies. It’s just about a phase. Recently, my posts have been philosophical and commemorative in nature, but this one is a little more personal.

Have you ever reached a ‘phase’ in your life when you suddenly don’t understand anything? Weird things happen. People who are really dear to you start frustrating you, and the funny thing is that you actually get frustrated. Indolence starts creeping in, and how much ever you want to change yourself, it doesn’t happen. Weird. You start worrying about your future, your past, your responsibilities, your reputation, or in a nutshell – yourself. You worry, but you don’t do anything, and that’s where things go out of hand – you get blocked and stuck.

Don’t get me wrong, my life does not suck. I am no hedonist. I believe problems and shortcomings are all a part of life. And life only gets better when you start to understand and correct them. But right now I am drowned with too many woes, which in no way should be mine. A lot of these woes have been transmitted from others, and have been created from self-construed conclusions and emotions, which ideally should not affect me. A lot of people have affected me to an extent that I am thoroughly perplexed. My thoughts have gone haywire. I worry too much. And the funny thing is that I know what my problem is – I have no control over my mind. And I also know the solution – Vipassana Meditation.

Ok, yeah, an unexpected solution, but hear me out. I am no ascetic nor a believer in any of these religious practices. But Vipassana is not a religios practice, in fact, it’s a science. It is a proved science that teaches you to get control over your mind. My parents are ardent meditators, who practice Vipassana religiously (no pun intended), and the effect it has had on them is unbelievable. My dad, known for his extra-worrying-attitude (like mine), has benefited so much from it, that mentally and emotinally he has reached a self satisfying balance, which, especially for a doctor, is priceless.

What does Vipassana do? It imparts in you the powers of concentration, memory and self control. It preaches no religion and forces nothing upon you, but allows self purfication in an extremely logical and scientific way. It helps you to think more rationally and chase away all your extraneous fears and worries. All it asks for is diligence, and that is not easy. You have to read about Vipassana – http://www.dhamma.org/

This ‘solution’ has been laid down on a platter for me. Still, I am not making the most of it. Why?
That is what’s worrying. I need to start focusing and working, and start studying! I need meditation, I need a peace of mind. It’s easy to say but let’s see if I actually start utilizing this solution? Because that’s where I’m failing myself.

P.S – Apologies for a truly boring and self centered post, but sometimes your blog is a good place to vent.