Addiction

This might seem strange. My “addiction” has nothing to do with alcohol, drugs, women or food. It’s a game. Not a mind game, not a board game and not really a “video game”, it’s well, by definition, a ‘computer’ game. It’s not something as meaningless as Counter Strike or Command & Conquer or something as ridiculous as The Sims. My addiction is Football Manager 2009.

What is Football Manager 2009? It is this football (soccer) “game” where the player (i.e YOU) takes charge of a football team (as its manager). You deal with everything related to the team – from tactics to transfers to press conferences to player dramas to managerial mind games and professional scouting. It as close as you can get to living every true football fanatic’s dream. I am stuck in.

This game is a platonic simulation of the real world. A world I would love to be a part of but of which I cannot yet, be a part of. So instead, I let myself divulge in a guilty pleasure, which would be all okay if I just left it at that. But this is where the addiction comes in. There are times when I just cannot stop playing it. I am more engrossed in it than I am engrossed in life and it’s as if I have given reins of my emotions to this stupid (not really) yet genius (totally) piece of manifestation (game). I get angry – not when I lose, but when I shouldn’t lose. I get so so angry. Mum gets the worst of it sometimes, which is, yes, scary. Addiction, you see?

I have tried oh so many times to stop playing. I have uninstalled and deleted every possible inch of it from my computer only to scathingly know that another copy of it lies on my external. I have downloaded the best possible tactics (don’t ask me how this is possible – it just is) and the best possible wonderkid shortlists from the world wide web, which, if you haven’t figured yet, have brought me less joy in victory and more pain in defeat, but that shimmering joy has been worth it (not really if you really come to think of it, but hey, I am getting carried away). I have given way too many hours of my life into something I have always wanted to become in real life, but it’s almost like I am letting the virtual experience ruin it. Addiction.

On a complete tangent, you can take this as a super awesome review of a truly genius game. It is so good and so real (at times) that it can literally get you addicted. I know I am not the only one. This game has destroyed marriages and killed jobs. It’s like Adam’s poisonous Apple. Shit, I’m getting biblical. Addiction. Bloody hell.

It’s sad in retrospect and I really need to get it out of my system. Even though it’s not the worst thing to be addicted to (heroin kills folks, remember?), it’s kinda embarrassing. No, but I really hope I could make this game reality, but until then I need to get rid of this stupid (not really) and genius (totally) e-pill.

P.S. Just for the record, I am currently doing pretty well with Birmingham actually, got them promoted and then some European action. But shit, I need to stop. Life’s kinda more important. Oh and Jason, help me out here man!