PRR
Guess who is joining the Premiership Rat Race (PRR) of use-lots-off-wealth-on-team-to-become-rich-and-famous – our very own, Sheikh Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum the proud ruler of Dubai. Yes Govind, you can partially rejoice – his Highness is planning to pitch in 480 million pounds to buy the living hell out of Liverpool. So, that somewhat means ,that Arsenal is the only nor-foreign-bought club, which ironically has a non-foreign coach and only 1 English player in its top playing 16. Right. The English, I tell you.
Anyway, why Liverpool is all happy is because now they can get a new stadium, and be totally wannabe’s of Arsenal. It’s okay Govind, it’s only natural for any club to do so. What Sheikh Mohammed is going to be doing is clearing all Liverpool debts (which not surprisingly is about 80 million pounds), buying controlling stake worth 180 million pounds and investing in the new stadium that will be built in Stanley Park. He, the owner of Dubai International Capital (DIC), is one rich man. Respect sir, and please don’t kick me out of the country.
It’s also fun, yes plain fun, to note that Dubai now indirectly owns major chunks of 2 clubs - Arsenal, with all the ‘Emirates’ sponsoring and Liverpool, with the latest DIC take-over bid. What’s even more fun to note is that now the premiership might turn out to be a 3 way battle – The Americans (Glazers & Man Utd) v/s The Russians (Abrahamovich & Chelsea) v/s The Middle East (Sheikh Mohammed & Liverpool). Boy oh boy – World War III indeed.
On a more saving-my-ass note, actually quite seriously, I have deep respect for our ruler Sheikh Mohammed. He is one hell of a strategist, and his vision is boundless but practical. Dubai is where it is because of him. Hats off on a great job sir, and good luck with Liverpool.
P.S. This post is a mixture of football and Dubai, so you’ll find it on both of my blogs. =)
40
I rock. From 6:30 AM on the 27th of October to 10:30 PM on the 28th of October, I did not sleep. This didn’t even include a 15-minute nap or a ‘siesta’ or what some call a few minutes of ‘power sleep’. Hah! It was the longest day of my life. From reaching the pinnacle of tension, to having the highest amount of adrenalin flowing through my veins, to dislocating fingers, to "DIFF"-ing, not only was my day friggin’ long, it was as eventfully dramatic. I most probably failed in my physics exam, dislocated my pinki, barfed on the school doc, and missed the entire inter-house cricket season. Shit, that ain’t any good. Damn. I suck.
Having never touched my physics book, on the eve of my second term physics examination, I am somewhat confident that I would be able to study enough to get the passing marks. But as I tread along, slowly, on the path to physical enlightenment, my fuel tank hits empty. Enter Red Bull. Time to revert to a previously non-existent plan B. My aim: to survive the night and reach as close as I can to the sweet grapes of physical thoroughness. Also, even if the plan fails, I would at least be able to gloat about the great over night survival. 24 hours of nocturn-ity complete.
The morning dawns, faster than it should have. My studies progress, slower than they should have. I finish half the portion, and my time is up. Red Bull seemed to be quite a saviour. It is definitely inspiring for it has printed on it: “Only drink in times of great stress. It will help provide extra energy and enhance your performance”. Inspiring indeed.
I finally reach school, buoyed up with drug-like energy, thanks to the ‘wings’ that I have received. Assembly ends on a sour note – the swimming team are told that they will not take part in their Inter School Meet due to a lack of practice, and my unfortunate self is a part of this team. However, it turns out to be just a threat, but anyway I don't go for the meet, because my eventually, my pinki betrays me.
Anyway, my physics exam begins, and the more I read the question paper, the more I forget. In the compulsory section, I half-confidently attempt only 5 questions of the 20. Not bad, huh? Section A of Part II, are worse, I attempt 2 subparts of 2 big questions instead of attempting the entire questions. Section B and Section C are not as bad, but aren't that pretty either. Anyway, all is not lost, I might just scrape through.
The exam ends, and I am glad that I don't have to come home and study, instead I have swimming practice. Practice is good, except for the fact that I learn that my kicks are very poor compared to everyone else’s. I don't have any strength in my legs. Now this definitely hurts the pride and ego of an individual who is considered to be a good sportsman. You start questioning God and the human body. How can you run decently fast, kick a football decently hard, but not be able to kick the water hard enough in swimming? I am confused, but it is explained to me that for different activities, a million different muscles are developed, and those swimming-kicking muscles of mine were very weak. Right.
Practice done, time for our Inter-House cricket match. (Please note: Right now, I haven’t devoured any sort of food. All that has sustained me is my second Red Bull. It has been 30 hours since I have slept.) The cricket match starts, and after just 3 balls, my inter house cricket career ends. Junaid plays a cut shot, and I try and dive for the ball. The ball reaches the boundary, buy my tiny left pinki (i.e. my left tiny finger) gets stuck into the ground. My body, however, continues under the physical force of momentum, and that dislocates my dear pinki, and it almost lies hanging at an angle of about 75 degrees. Not pretty. I relocate it back to it’s place with a “thuk” and then run to the doctor. My body then takes its turn to betray me. It decides to take advantage/revenge on the pain it’s feeling, by sweeping me with nausea and dizziness. I then vomit, and try to control vehemently, but I cannot prevent myself from spewing a bit onto the unfortunate doctor. But the puking helps. I regain self control and apologize profusely to the doctor. The Principal, the Headmaster, the Senior Supervisor, the Admin Officers, the English teacher, the Cricket teachers, the Afternoon-Activities coordinator, and the remaining world suddenly come bursting onto the scene. Lying in bed, due to the nausea, I am told unanimously by all: you will be okay!
I am then ‘rushed’ to hospital, and I go quite reluctantly, only after having a verbal war with the nurse – “I want to watch the cricket match.” But that isn’t good enough. Then I am very thankful to Ali, Tejas and Romit who succeed in entertaining my ass off. They want to come to the hospital, but are blown away by the furious nurse, who had earlier given me glucose, that actually tasted really good. I am fine, no real pain, only a slight niggling pain when I move my little left pinki.
The journey to the hospital is boring. Dad’s a doctor, and he works at Welcare, so obviously I exploit the situation. Even then it takes me an hour before I get to see the doc. Meanwhile I am observing a Filipino wife in her black ‘Burkha’ with a broken leg ordering her Arab husband around. That’s weird indeed, but common in this part of the world. The x-ray shows nothing, but the doc assumes ligament damage. And then finally I reach home without any big plaster to show off, but only this small piece of scrap bandage. Boring patch of the post I know – but still. :P
Well any reasonable human being would have then gone to sleep, especially when there was puking, breaking fingers, etc involved in the previous 6 hours. But I don’t follow normality. It has now been 36 hours without sleep. Mum tells me to sleep. I ignore. I have the DIFF, i.e. Dubai International Film Festival Volunteer Recruitment Session, to attend. The Red Bull energy is still pumping, I make my way there, despite my sister’s warning of a ‘sudden collapse’. Don’t worry nothing of that sort happens, at least then.
Finally we, as in Romit and I, reach the Knowledge Village Auditorium, which I am pretty impressed with. We see a bunch of Modern High girls there. Obviously. What follows is a long lecture and a lot of, “Eh, she’s hot man” and “No, not my type Anish” (note: I am not referring to any Modern High girls there, so please prevent pervasion of rumours). I meet an Al-Mu’atmaar ex-mate Alex, who is btw, a girl, and who is also half-Irish, half-Punjabi. Yeah, don’t ask. She doesn’t remember my name, but at least she remembers me, so kudos to her on that. The evening, otherwise isn’t that exciting. We register for three 6-hour shifts as ticket-checkers or line-keepers or seat-showers – yeah not too exciting either, but it’s an experience in its own way.
Romit and I then eat some heavy KFC and then make tired conversation on our journey home. I arrive to greet my sister, and an official collapse hits me. My sister, the darling she is, irons my school clothes for me, as I treat my semi-broken pinki with ice. I then look at my watch. 10:30 PM – 40 hours. Wow. One hell of a rollercoaster, and one hell of a ‘long’ day.
P.S. Song to listen to: Matchbox 20 – Long Day.
And today, this one person that I care about, and who apparently cares/cared about me, asks me to give up on he
r. I cry and then laugh at ‘God’, and then at world.
Transitional Blogiarrhea
Okay. The past few posts have been admit tingly random and blah. I didn’t like them, and nor did many of you. The “Going ONE Better” was so fake-sounding. I so over-exaggerated everything. Fine ONE TV is doing well, but it’s not as if the world had found a cure for AIDS. It sounded like that didn’t it? “Oh One is brilliant” and "so is their website" and "wow" this and "wow" that – bull shit. ONE's good, and I appreciate what ONE’s done, but there was no friggin’ substance in my post. It seems as though I was trying too bloody hard. My sister blurted that out to me yesterday, as frankly as she always does, and however much I am not supposed to 'like' it, I appreciate the honesty, because it does make sense. Thanks & damn.
And to add salt to these unsympathetic wounds, “anonymous’s” were on a rampage. What I am about to say does not refer to any of the genuine anonymous commenters who actually constructively criticize and state their opinion. In fact I respect their genuineness. But what’s annoying is when people from my school, who are in my friggin’ class, who I probably know damn well, start posting blatantly offensive, anonymous comments which make no sense and are just put forth to satisfy their desire to extract envious, sadistic pleasure. Screw you guys. It’s evident that you guys don’t have the balls to have an identity, and that you prefer masking your sadism behind this “anonymous” image. It’s so shit, and it just shows how fake you people are, because you require some other random anonymous image to prove to the world that this blogger sucks. Grow up guys, quick.
Let me quote a few examples:
“Anonymous said...
malpani u be a gud advertising agent ... man many companies will come to u onli 4 da reason dat dey hav to advertise their product ..
November 28, 2006 7:32 PM”
What’s the point of saying something like that? I’d rather prefer you tell me what the hell is wrong with my post in a ‘dignified’ manner, as Ashiq puts it, rather than saying such baseless rubbish. Tell me that the post sucked because it lacked substance and effort, and because it was exaggerated. I’ll accept it, and feel bad at the same time, not at you, but at myself. That way, you’ll get your sick sadistic pleasure too.
“Anonymous said...
crap malpani.....advertising for one tv
“Anonymous said...
No holiday on wed and thurs. That's just effing sad innit?
“Other said...
Congrats, you've got more posts on your 3rd post than Anish got in his 20+ posts. Not a competition I know. You've written a good post that everyone has a different stand on.
Going "One" Better
ONE TV, or rather "Dubai ONE TV" recently changed their look. They re-did their adverts, their teasers, their logo and added more style to the rapidly improving channel. I am downright proud to say that the new look is funky and very, very professional. Gone are the Ch. 33 days that concentrated more on horse-racing and 'The Bold & The Beautiful', than good entertainment.
The whole 'red comma' effect is brilliant. The 'Matrix' hit-off of using the 'comma' as bullets is, more than anything, very professionally done, and downright cool. The whole trampoline and ribbon effect with the comma's and the 3-note ONE TV tune is quite awesome too, both looks-wise and brain-wise. Don't know what I am talking about? Check out the 'One TV' fillers - "ongoing entertainment" indeed.
And the channel is not just superficially efficient. They've bought rights for 'Desperate Housewives' and air a brilliant plethora of fascinating programs. Even though the addition of 'Desperate Housewives' was done a year later here than in the rest of the world, ONE TV succeeds in giving a holistic combination of entertainment to satisfy all needs, and what's even more worthy of a mention is that, these guys at ONE seem desperate to do better, and that's always good sign, ain't it?
The reason for this post - I was highly impressed by ONE, and maybe I really enjoyed today's 'Friends' episode aired on it. But none the less, ONE TV kicks MBC 4's ass, right now at least. As for the other Middle East channels, they are pretty poor in comparison, and have a lot to catch up on. Learn from the 'one' and the only pride-earner!
P.S. I am in no way affiliated to ONE TV, and in no way is this some publicity effort for them. My appreciation is genuine. And to add, even their website is brilliant.
The Blogging Bug…
Almost everyone's got it now, and it's spreading like fire on fuel. Brilliant.
Everyone has a blog. Everyone that doesn't have one, wants one. Yes ALI, you do too. Admit it. Admit it.
From Shweta's republican attacks to Harry's homosexuality, things are indeed getting interesting. Nothing "Secret-Dubai-awe-stirring-like" though - Harry's coming close. Ashiq's getting wiser, but his blog ain't going anywhere, even though the 3 posts he has are brilliantly brilliant. Consistency is vital. The Cryptic is somewhat revived, thank God. Romit's memory is pushing along. Vent-spaces are growing and daring moves are being made - 'Sex & Dubai' - unbelievable. 'Sex & Dubai' (who is referred to as a person) is actually a part of the UAE Blog Community. Oh, and I advice all you fellow UAE-based bloggers to register to the UAE Blog Community to increase hits, and spread the fact that "they know they want it". Also registering yourself with Technorati is another way of officially establishing yourself in the blogosphere.
All you other budding dogmats (:P), get hold of a blog. It's simple, it's a way of growing, it's entertaining, it's your way of being a part of the world wide web that is making our world smaller and smaller, it's your newspaper, it's your memory, it's your way of being heard, it's your way of connecting with world and making those previously-impossible contacts, it's your space - you do what you want with it - enjoy it. Rajiv, Republican - you would do really well with one.
Blog on!
P.S. Maths = screwed.
Reco-s
Anything to get past the earlier post, I thought I would put up some of the stuff that I listen to. Many a time, I find it hard to find good music, and if you find yourself in the same rut, maybe this will help you.
- Meatloaf & Marion Raven - It's All Coming Back To Me Now: Personally, I really like it. It's one of those slowish rock songs, with a lot of piano. But what makes it brilliant is the duet between Meatloaf and Raven, it's beautifully put together.
- Oasis - Masterplan: Known to most as emotional or "cry-ey" song makers , Oasis fail to disappoint with another similar rendition. But hey, it's still really good. It's a very new song, and will do well on the charts. A must hear.
- Christina Aguilera - Hurt: Yeah fine, everyone considers her to be one of the "Britney-Spears" types, but no one can deny her ability to sing. Hurt is an okay song technically, but Christina Aguilera's voice will just blow you away. Shit, she is awesome. It starts of as a piano acoustic, and then moves into some drums and violin. I really enjoy listening to it.
- The Scorpions - Hurricane 2000: Ali made me listen to this, and the intro just makes me listen to it over and over again. It's a re-make of the Scoripions-hit, Rock You Like A Hurricane, but with an orchestra backing it. Again, brilliant.
- Rascal Flatts - What Hurts The Most: This Tejas recommended to me, in his bid to tell me how he could relate so much to it. Sometimes, that's what makes a song awesome, the fact that you can relate to every word. Anyway, it's a good song. I like the lead singer's voice.
- Jimmy Eat World - Pain: I love the pace of this song, and the name "pain" is very daunting. I love listening to it!
- Good Charlotte - Emotionless: A very emotion-full song - that's why I like it.
- Matchbox Twenty - Soul: I had to put an unheard-of Matchbox Twenty song to pay homage to my favourite band. This song is full of energy. Maybe you won't like it when you hear it for the first time, but the words and the passion makes it a very close-to-the-heart song once you start liking it.
- Snow Patrol Featuring Martha Wainwright - Set The Fire To The Third Bar: The new Snow Patrol song that really grows on you. This one has been on my playlist for quite some time. It once, meant a lot to me.
- Razorlight - America: It's a very nice song to listen. Just nice. I thought I did not like it, but then I heard it randomly and I was like "nice".
A few hard songs which I love listening to at full volume when I am pissed off or when I require energetic inspiration:
- Cobra Starship - Snakes On A Plane
- 30 Seconds To Mars - The Kill
- Shinedown - Save Me
- Crossfade - Cold
- 3 Doors Down - This Time (Tejas' recommended)
- My Chemical Romance - Helena
- Incubus - Megalomaniac (Nishant's recommended)
- Tantric - Mourning
- Silverchair - Tomorrow
Enjoy!
P.S. Any recommendations?
Random Questioning…
If a human you consider "great", or "good", or "God-like" or whom you have great "respect" for, dies, will you mourn his death? Or will you celebrate what he stood for? - His "great" existence.
Why do I ask? Last year on the 25th of November, George Best, one of the greatest English footballers to grace the earth, died. As usual, the following weekend, all premiership matches had a minute of "silence" to remember this great footballer. But the silence changed to cheers, loud, energetic cheers from the fans at Old Trafford hailing their hero and saying Amen for everything he did and stood for. The passionate reverberations could be heard and felt through the television, and all the commentators said was why mourn the death of a great man when you can appreciate "him" for what he was? I bet George Best would have preferred the cheer to the one minute silence. We all die. He was 59, some still consider that "young", but his days were numbered anyway. So accept death, but rejoice his greatness, right? I mean wouldn't you prefer that- the cheer of appreciation, when you die, to the mournful dreary silence? I would.
P.S. I don't know, this question has been stuck in my head for quite, quite a while, almost an year, I had to blurt it out.
Redial Entertainment
Post board-exam time, Redial Entertainment will begin officially.
What we are all about:
We like doing things. Obviously. We all have some talent or the other and we don't want to waste it. So we plant do something useful with it. Redial Entertainment is, as Tejas said, a Non-Profit organization, at least financially. The profit we want from this is the exposure, the fun, the references, the recommendations and over and above it all, the experience.
What we'll offer:
A plethora of randomly connected things - that's what we will offer. Our main concentration will be media-related projects, but the break down below of what each of us will do for Redial Entertainment, will give you an idea as to what Redial Entertainment will exactly offer.
Members:
- Anish Malpani - Manager/Head of Production/Editor/ Brand Manager
- Tejas Menon - Assistant Manager/Director Of Photography/Assistant Sound-Advisor/ Assistant Brand Manager/ Editor
- Ali Yar Khan - Lead Guitarist (up for "loan", will play for those who deservingly require him)/Music & Sound Advisor
- Harendra Kapur - Head Of Advertising/Voice Over-er/Actor (on loan)/Creative Advisor
- Romit Sen - Head Cameraman/Assistant Editor/Head Archiver/Video-Creative Advisor
Special Advisory Team & Support:
Mr Axel Rodericks
Mrs Sharen Lobo
Mr Axel Rodericks
Mrs Sharen Lobo
What we plan to specialize in:
- Video/Presentations for any purpose (Professional Backgrounds, Professional Video Support, Amateur Trailers, Amateur Advertisements, Memory Based Videos, Fun Videos, etc)
- Lead Guitarist Available
- Sound/Music Advice
- Actor/Voice Over-giver available
- Background Music + Minus Tracks
- Amateur Band Management & Support
NOTE: Redial Entertainment is very flexible. We will do whatever we can. If we are told to handle an event, and we see potential fun and experience-giving experience, we will go for it.
We are not going force anyone to pay us for our work. Materialistically, all we want is references and recommendations.
Visit us: www.redial-entertainment.blogspot.com
What you will get from the site:
Our ambitions, and all our previous videos. We are trying to upload as many as we can. Plus, we will get a domain later, and make things more professional.
What we want you to do:
If you want any of the above mentioned things processed, please contact us.
If you know anyone who might want the above mentioned things processed, please contact us.
Any support will be appreciated.
Thank you
Contact Us:
redial.entertainment@gmail.com
Stress…
Stress is everywhere. Exam time - it's around even more. Everyone, everywhere, is going through 'shit'. So what all us "going-through-shit-ers" need is more stress. Confused? My theory - "Beyond a point, shit stress converts to fun stress, so get stressed above that point." I really don't know what I am saying.
"Calm is for wimps. Get real. Get stressed."
Some stress-increasing maneuvers:
- Choose friends you don't like.
- Be late. Always.
- Behave like a sardar...
- Go to the premiere of Casino Royale. Sit next to people. Talk loudly.
- On your way out of the cinema, discuss the end of Casino Royale loud enough for the world to hear.
- Record the sound of a dentist's drill. Play it at bedtime.
- Recognize your limitations. Then ignore them.
- Recognize other peoples' limitations. Then tell them what to do.
- Before reaching the paying counter of Carrefour, remove all the bar-codes of your shopping so they won't scan.
- If you can't do it, don't let others do it.
- The best policy - Be honest. All the time. With everyone. About everything.
- The better policy - Lie. All the time. To everyone. About everything.
- Practise rudeness, not just to make others feel bad, but also to make you feel bad about yourself. It's a win-win situation.
- Fart in confined spaces. But only if other people are present.
- Burp, and then say "Bless Me".
- Hear others burp, and then say "Bless You".
- Whine daily.
- Become a politician.
- Have Red Bull before going to bed.
- Never return things you borrow.
- Get a job writing junk mail.
- Blog about "how you open the bathroom door".
- Take credit for successes you have nothing to do with.
- Buy a multi-alarm clock. Set the alarm for every 30 minutes. Then go to sleep.
- HFZ - Make yourself a Humour Free Zone. If you ever find yourself laughing, go to the bathroom and get yourself together.
- Always borrow money from your friends. Forget or put off repaying them for as long as possible.
- Make study schedules you cannot keep up with.
- Leave everything to the last minute.
- At family get-togethers, start talking about the following: sex.
- Be a wet blanket.
- Write down your worries. Read the list before you go to bed.
- Learn to snore.
- Shout at people at least twice a day.
- Try your best to make every competitor know that you are licking ass to become a prefect.
- Buy shoes one size too small.
- Always criticize everyone's clothes.
- Become like Karan. (sorry, I am in the mood)
- Blame everyone else for your failure.
- Remember that there is absolutely no point in talking about someone behind their back unless they get to hear about it.
- Never have a bath.
- Forget brushing your teeth.
- Eat lots and lots of garlic, and then ask your crush for her number.
- Make rumours. Spread them.
- Intentionally fail in your exams.
- Join the "best" school.
- Try and enjoy the stress...
- Do you have any more of these?
P.S. Gone are the stress-free days so make use of the stress-ful ones. Most of the above quotes were taken from "The Little Book Of Stress" written by Rohan Candappa. One of the quotes in it is, " Take credit for successes you have nothing to do with." Thanks Rohan.
No offense intended.
Oh Vice Captain, My Vice Captain!
One person I haven't formally thanked yet is Aaron Luke Gomes, my vice-captain. The deadliest finisher of our team who spear-heads the attack, Aaron has been great support throughout the 5 years that has ultimately led to this mammoth victory.
From the Al Diyafah U-16 Inter School Football Tournament victory, to all the Inter House Football victories, to last year's elimination, to this year's victory - Aaron has always been there beside me, and I have always prized his opinion. Besides that Aaron, our combination on the field has been more than deadly, and I love playing with you. This time 5 of the goals we scored were because of our combination!
Respect Aaron! Tomorrow, when we get the trophy in front of the school, the both of us will lift it, with the team and everyone else beside/behind/around us. =)
P.S. I did not forget, it just kind off slipped...